Alright, let’s be real here for a sec. Taking your kids to China? That’s either an incredibly awesome idea or a terribly misguided one. This ain’t your typical walk in the park kind of family vacation destination.
But that’s exactly what makes it so insanely cool. China is a wild mix of mind-bending ancient attractions, full-throttle modern metropolises, and untamed natural wonders. In other words, it’s the ultimate adventure playground for kids and thrill-seeking adults alike.
Now, I’m not gonna lie – navigating the language barriers, crazy crowds, and vastness of the country ain’t easy with little ones in tow. But with some insider knowledge and a battle plan, you can turn an epic China family adventure into a reality.
Table of contents
Big City Excitement for the Whole Squad
Let’s kick things off with China’s show-stopping cities because, well, that’s where all the insane action goes down. And despite their concrete jungles, these urban beasts are packed with awesome kid-friendly activities.
Beijing’s Iconic Hits
You can’t hit up Beijing without checking out:
- The Forbidden City – This place is like a real-life medieval fantasyland with enough palaces, temples, and gardens to make your kids’ jaws hit the floor.
- The Great Wall – Sure, it’s a mega touristy cliche. But c’mon, walking this ancient engineering marvel is a right of passage. The Badaling section has perks like kid-sized hiking trails to keep it fun.
- Summer Palace – Another jaw-dropper with its rainbow-colored buildings, hilltop views, and massive marble boat that makes you wonder if some Chinese emperor was overcompensating for something.
- Houshen Animal Eco-Park – When the history fatigue kicks in, let them run wild at this massive zoo/amusement park hybrid. From kung-fu panda encounters to carnival rides, it’s a guaranteed blast.
Stellar Shanghai Shenanigans
Then you’ve got the glossy, futuristic awesomeness of Shanghai with more cool stuff like:
- The Bund – No first-timer can resist strolling this iconic riverfront strip for mindblowing skyline views and nonstop snacking opportunities.
- Shanghai Disneyland – This ain’t your average Disney experience. We’re talking pure theme park insanity on steroids that deserves multiple day visits.
- Shanghai Science & Tech Museum – Even kids who think museums are lame will be blown away by all the hands-on, interactive amazingness here.
- Zhujiajiao Water Town – This living fairy tale village is the perfect break from urban chaos, with ancient canals, bridges, and homes transporting you to another era.
Where to Crash & Get Your Nom On
Okay, so now you’ve got a gameplan for keeping the crew entertained. But where to stay? And more importantly, how to keep them fed and happy in between all the sightseeing shenanigans? I gotchu covered.
Family-Friendly Accommodation FTW
Zeroing in on the right hotel can make or break a famjam China adventure. You’ll want a spot with:
- Suites/apartment-style rooms so you’re not crammed like sardines
- Kitchens/kitchenettes for whipping up basic meals and snacks
- Playrooms, game rooms, pools, and outdoor spaces for burning energy
- On-site restaurants with legit kids menus, not just an afterthought
- Locations near public transit, attractions, and grocery stores
Some solid family-friendly hotel chains include Shangri-La, Holiday Inn, and Wyndham. But read that review fine print – amenities and vibes can vary by individual property.
Keeping ‘Em Fed in China
I know, I know – Chinese cuisine might as well be alien food for a lot of kids. But have no fear, there are tricks to keeping those picky eaters satisfied:
- Stick to fams with familiar proteins like chicken, beef, or seafood over adventurous animal parts.
- Kids menus at hotels often have Western staples like pasta, sandwiches, and chicken tenders. Not authentic but it works!
- Buffets are a godsend since kids can create simple meals from plain rice, noodles, fruit, etc.
- Pack a stash of tried-and-true snacks from home for backup.
- When all else fails, you can usually find a McDonald’s in any major city. Hey, no judgement – happy kids = happy parents.
Activities That Immerse ‘Em in Chinese Culture
Okay, so they’ve oohed and aahed over all the big iconic sights. Now what? Part of the beauty of family travel is injecting some cultural immersion and edutainment into the experience. And China’s got plenty of that going on in spades.
Getting Hands-On With Traditions
- Chinese Acrobat Shows – These extraordinarily choreographed feats of human strength and agility will straight-up blow their minds.
- Kung-Fu Lessons – Let your little ones channel their inner Bruce Lees and martial arts masters with some basic combat moves and stances. Way cooler than soccer camp.
- Arts & Crafts Classes – From intricately cut paper designs to creating inked calligraphy masterpieces, these traditional folk arts get kids brains & hands working.
- Chinese Cooking Classes – What kid doesn’t dig getting their hands doughy to fold dumplings, pull noodles, or roll spring rolls? Now that’s edutainment.
- Chinese YoYo/Diabolo – These deceptively simple skill toys are rooted in ancient acrobatic traditions and oddly mesmerizing time-sucks.
Experiencing Living Cultures
- Beijing’s Hutong Neighborhoods – Wander these historic residential alleyways for a raw look at old-world local life in all its chaotic, pulsating glory.
- Xi’an Muslim Quarter – This vibrant market and mosque-filled pocket showcases China’s ethnic diversity in full force.
- Rural Village Homestays – Whether working farms or remote mountain hamlets, hanging with locals offers unfiltered insights into rustic, off-the-grid lifestyles.
Long-Distance China Travel: The Stamina Challenge
So you’ve got the in-destination deets handled. But how the heck do you survive epically long plane, train, and car rides while keeping antsy kids happy? It’s a true heroic feat of stamina.
Airplane and Rail Mastery
The key is taking precautions like:
- Booking direct flights wherever possible to avoid soul-crushing layovers.
- For long-haul train rides, springing for cushy soft sleeper berths so you’ve got space to spread out.
- Packing an overstuffed bag o’tricks with video games, books, art supplies – anything to entertain and distract for hours.
- Building in purposeful exercise/stretch breaks during transits to burn off pent-up energy in airport play areas.
Mastering the Road Trip Warriors
Buckle up if you dare to road trip across China’s vastness:
- Be ready for maddening unpredictability – random road closures, missing signs, and soul-crushingly epic traffic jams.
- Break up driving into bite-sized chunks, stopping every few hours for kids to unleash their zoomies.
- Stock up on road trip snacks, games, playlists, and videos to prevent the dreaded “are we there yets?”
- Build in quirky side attractions en route like a quick hike through a bamboo forest or wander through a small rural village.
- Pack obscene amounts of patience, distraction tactics, and Xanax (just kidding…kind of).
Your Next Insane Family Adventure Awaits!
From the Great Wall to Shanghai’s space-age spectacles, China’s dizzying combo of man-made wonders, natural thrills, and cultural immersion is like cramming a whole galaxy’s worth of experiences into one country.
So get those kids Ready Player One’d on China’s chaotic awesomeness. Study up on these tips and tricks. Then dive headfirst into the Middle Kingdom’s distinct brand of family bonding shenanigans.
Who knows, you might just create some of those priceless core memories they’ll be nostalgically re-watching like video clips decades from now. Or they might just drive you to the brink and back. But hey, that’s all part of the silly, dysfunctional, awesome adventure!
